Personal branding gets a bad rap sometimes, and as a personal brand expert, let me tell you…I get it.

We’ve all seen them — the smarmy crypto gurus or the “assets first, message second” selfies (hey, if you got it, flaunt it but know what type of audience you’re going to attract with it…); we’ve all encountered influencers and personal brands that make us wince.

It’s the online equivalent of a used car salesman or the woman in your town who seems to be taking part in a reality show that only she’s watching…the end result is the same — something just feels “off” about the brand. 

So, as you construct your personal brand, how do you ensure that you come off as the genuine human you are and not like a self-absorbed sleazeball?

Here’s your 7-point non-cringe personal brand checklist:

1. Begin with your audience in mind.

If your commitment is to serve others, it’s near impossible to be self-serving. Think of your audience as your anchor. When you’re clear on who it is you’re helping/teaching with your content, you can proverbially paddle around, have fun, fish, and do all the things without becoming unmoored from your core brand purpose — to help others solve a challenge or problem.

 📌Pin this takeaway:

The purpose of a personal brand is to help others; through this selfless act, you end up helping yourself.

2. Before you create content, ask yourself, “Why would someone read this?”

This is the million-dollar question when it comes to creating content. You’ll find that this question is like a safety pin that releases all the hot air from a potential self-centered content balloon.

Some great follow-up questions to tack on to this:

1. Is this content educating my audience?
2. Is this content empathizing with my audience and validating their feelings?
3. Is my content entertaining my audience?
4. Is this content inspiring my audience to take action or get “unstuck”?

If your answer is “yes” to one of these 4 questions, you’ve kept the focal point of your content where it should be — the people you’re serving. 

3. Lean into gratitude/learning.

Whenever I work with executive clients to share great news — whether it be a book launch, an award, or a new hire— the first question is always, “Will this make me sound self-congratulatory?” My answer? As with everything, it’s all in the framing.

A few great ways to frame exciting news and accolades are the following:

1. Share the “story” behind the glory. 

Look, no one really cares that you hit 15,000 followers, but they are interested in learning about your journey to hit this milestone. This provides more context and allows your audience to connect their path to your own. Dalia does this brilliantly below:

2. Lead with gratitude.

Giving thanks to those who recognized your efforts and those who worked with you to earn that recognition is a fantastic way to show your audience that “it takes a village” and turn some of the attention to others that have contributed along the way. Gratitude is a potent antidote to chest-beating. 

4. Embrace vulnerability.

Whenever I post something that I fear will sound like the “All about you!” alarm, I connect my own vulnerability and feelings of anxiety around sharing the update to the feelings my audience may experience as well. This goes back to item three — “Why should your audience consume what you’re posting?”

5. Tag a buddy to check your ego.

After creating content, I immediately walk away and kick it over to my director of operations and my assistant to give it an “ego sniff test.” I often ask them how the content lands for them, if they think it’s valuable, and what their takeaways are. If either one of them waffles in answering these questions, it’s time to take it to the cutting room floor. Similarly, I’ve sent content to some of my best friends. No one is better at calling you on your bllsht quite like your besties.

6. Watch your language.

No, I don’t mean cursing. I mean thoughtfully review your content paying close attention to how often you say “I/me” and how often you use “you.” If you are me, me, me-ing all the way home (hehe) then it’s typically a good indicator you’ve taken your eye off your audience.

Overuse of first-person pronouns also makes you seem less credible. A study by the University of Texas revealed that when people overuse the word "I," they're usually in positions of lower authority or power.

"Frequent 'I' users subconsciously believe they are subordinate to the person to whom they are talking," shares Elizabeth Bernstein.

When trying to build a brand around thought leadership and authority, the unconscious use of this pronoun can actually work against you.

Excessive use of the word "I" also creates a barrier between you and your audience. Most people consume content to figure out what's in it for them. When you "me-speak" throughout, you decrease the opportunity for your content to connect in a way that will eventually spur someone into action (that action rightfully being to reach out to you).

7. Check for hyperbole and other words that silently undercut your credibility.

Similar to the word “I” and “me,” excessive use of aggrandizing language usually turns audience members off. We’ve all seen the Facebook ads that boast about a “23-year-old who went from ‘living in their parents’ basement’ to making 7 figures plus a year!”

Look, in the good year 2023, we’ve been around the internet block enough times to know scammy, overreaching language when we see it. I’m not saying don’t use helpful facts and figures to fortify your message, but I am saying to stay away from the “as seen on tv” dictionary of:

“the very best”

“totally awesome”

“you won’t believe it”

…or anything else that likely exited Billy Mays's mouth on a 2 am infomercial.

The Recap:

1. Personal branding can be sleazy, but when done right, it should be anything but.
2. Keep your eyes on the prize — helping your audience, and you’ll give yourself guardrails to keep your ego in check.
3. When in doubt, use the list of 7 filters above to check the cringe at the door.